


April Fool's

by animomma



Series: The Life and Times of Victuuri [4]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Domestic, Eventual Smut, Family, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Victuuri Week, but not too smutty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-05
Updated: 2018-02-05
Packaged: 2019-03-14 00:21:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13582062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/animomma/pseuds/animomma
Summary: Yuuri gets tired of his family pulling April Fool's Day tricks on him, and decides to get glorious revenge.





	April Fool's

Yuuri opened his eyes slowly, blinking blearily at the empty pillow next to him. Where was Victor? He sat up and rubbed his eyes, yawning.

Then he remembered why he was sleeping alone. He had mercilessly kicked his husband out of the room last night, slamming the door and locking it before he’d been able to get back in. The years had taught him harshly that this night was not one to be trifled with, and even the pitiful look in Victor’s beautiful eyes hadn’t been enough to convince Yuuri to let him sleep in their bed.

Because today was April Fool’s Day. And, to make it worse, it was a Sunday, which meant that there would be no reprieve for him in the form of work.

Every year, Victor and Aki teamed up to play a series of pranks on the hapless Yuuri, who somehow never seemed to see them coming. He was well-known in their family for being gullible, and therefore was the perfect target for the scheming duo. Too many times to count, he had ended up with unpleasant substances in his hair, in his mouth, or on his feet. 

This year, however, Yuuri had a plan. He was going to exact his revenge. After many long years of being the victim, he was going to take his vengeance with a swift, brutal hand. To that end, Yuuri busied himself in preparing the prank for his dear husband, an evil smile playing at his lips as he did so.

When he had finished, Yuuri grabbed a spare change of clothes, and cautiously padded over to the door and cracked it open. He looked up, checking for anything balanced on the frame, and peeked at the floor, making sure there wasn’t anything for him to step it. Satisfied with his inspection, Yuuri swung the door open wide, and nearly jumped out of his skin as a loud blast sounded throughout the apartment. He yanked the door back towards him, and saw that someone had duct-taped an air horn onto the handle so that it would hit the wall when the door was opened. 

Apparently having used it as their cue, Victor and Aki came prancing into the hallway, and shouted together, “April Fool’s!” Aki continued, “Good morning, Otousan!” as Victor sidled up to his husband, attempting to steal a kiss. Yuuri turned his head away, letting the kiss fall on his cheek instead, as he gasped for air and clutched at his chest. He’d been expecting something, of course, but there was nothing that was quite like the experience of an air horn first thing in the morning.

Victor pouted. “Yuuuuri, where’s my morning kiss?” he whined, giving Yuuri his best puppy dog eyes. 

Yuuri narrowed his eyes at him. “Oh, I don’t know, it probably flew out of the apartment along with my heart!”

Aki laughed. “Oh, Otousan, it’s just a little joke. Now, come on, let’s go have some breakfast!”

Yuuri turned his suspicious gaze on his daughter now, but chose to say nothing. His plan for today was to walk into every trap they had set, building up his wrath and lulling the two of them into a false sense of accomplishment until the final culmination of his counter pranks. His pride told him that he was going to purposely set off each prank, while the more rational part of his brain mumbled that he probably wouldn’t notice half of them, anyway. Still, he nodded, and docilely followed his teenaged daughter into the kitchen, Victor trailing sadly behind him like a kicked dog.

He entered the room to see that the table had already been set, and food was waiting in each of their places. Yeah, that definitely meant something was wrong with it. But Yuuri pretended not to notice, and sat down at his spot, yawning widely to convey the idea that perhaps he was too tired to notice the obvious set-up. 

He decided to start with the bowl of cereal in front of him, and reached out to grab the spoon as his husband and daughter arranged themselves around the table. As he lifted the spoon, the entire bowl of cereal came with it. Not expecting the extra weight, the spoon slid through his fingers and the whole thing clattered onto the table. He winced, expecting to be splattered with milk, but nothing happened. Yuuri looked up to see Aki and Victor trying to hold back giggles, and Aki spluttered out, “April Fool’s, Otousan! We froze the milk overnight.” She smiled widely, with a brightness that warmed Yuuri’s heart, but he nevertheless added a mental tick to his growing list of items for revenge.

He laughed lightly. “That was pretty clever,” he replied as he picked up the donut sitting on a small plate next to him and took a tentative bite. As soon as he did, the wrongness of the entire thing filled his taste buds, and he hastily spit it out, gagging as he did. “Uugh!” he wailed, wrinkling his lip up. “Mayonnaise? Really?”

Victor giggled this time, and smiled sweetly at his husband. Another tally added.

Yuuri had to get the disgusting taste out of his mouth. He picked up the orange juice they had set out for him, not even considering the possible consequences as he gulped down a huge mouthful. His eyes widened, and he coughed and spluttered into his glass, choking out what he could of the vile liquid. “GAAAAH! What the hell IS that?” he demanded, wiping his mouth on his napkin.

By this point, Aki and Victor were both in stitches, giggling wildly. Aki managed to get out, “We put a mac and cheese packet in the water, Otousan!”

Yuuri smiled thinly. Oh, this one was going to cost them. He stood up as his family’s laughter subsided and they began to eat their own breakfasts. Makkachin wandered into the kitchen as he did, and Yuuri fed him the mayonnaise donut, figuring that the poodle wouldn’t care what filling the pastry had inside it. He wandered over to the counter, and opened a cabinet to pull out a mug. He checked the coffee machine, saw it was full, and tentatively poured himself some. He sniffed the liquid surreptitiously, at least wanting some forewarning this time if it was tampered with. Satisfied that this was, indeed, coffee, Yuuri opened up the sugar bowl and spooned a couple small heaps into his mug, stirring it thoughtfully. 

Victor looked up at him, and smiled warmly. “Yuuri, luybov moya, I’m sorry about breakfast. Would you like me to make you something for real to eat?”

Yuuri gave him a wan smile. “No, thanks, I’ll just stick to my coffee,” he replied, raising it to his lips. He noticed the sparkle in Victor’s eye a split second too late, the hot liquid already gliding over his tongue. He gurgled into his mug, spitting out what he could.

“What the hell?” he gasped, looking in confusion at the coffee.

Victor and Aki both burst out laughing. “We switched the sugar with salt,” Aki explained, earning a high-five from her papa.

Yuuri seethed internally. He plunked his mug down on the counter, abandoning the idea of breakfast. He strode around the counter and headed out to the hallway. Victor called after him, “Yuuri, where are you going?”

He yelled back, “I’m going to go take a shower in peace!”

When he reached the bathroom door, he slammed it shut behind him, then leaned up against it with a small sigh. All he had wanted was breakfast. He smirked to himself. Oh, was he going to enjoy his revenge later.

He was suddenly aware of the combined unpleasant tastes in his mouth, and decided that, to start, he should brush his teeth. He opened the toothpaste cap and smelled the end of it, remembering a year when it had been replaced with mayonnaise. Mayo seemed to be a favorite prank material for his family. This year, however, all he smelled was minty toothpaste. Good. Yuuri squeezed a small amount of paste onto his toothbrush, wetted it under the sink, and stuck it into his mouth.

Instantly, he regretted it. Beneath the mint flavor of the toothpaste, an unmistakable saltiness filled his mouth. He spluttered and spat it out, rinsing his mouth under the stream of water in the sink.

Salt on the toothbrush. Not bad.

Yuuri decided that it was fair game to use Victor’s toothbrush instead, and did so, after a thorough inspection of it. His mouth finally rid of the combined tastes of several pranks, he stepped into the shower and turned on the water. 

As soon as the water hit his head, Yuuri was surrounded by an unusual smell. He sniffed the air inquisitively. Was that…chicken soup? What the hell? Where would that smell be coming from? 

He opened the curtain tentatively, wondering if someone had sneaked into the bathroom to fill it with chicken soup or some such nonsense. Nobody was there, however, and neither were any bowls (or sinks) full of soup. Puzzled, Yuuri closed the curtain again, and then noticed the color of the water around his feet. It was yellow. 

Startled, he turned around and looked at the water coming out of the shower head. It was also yellow, and…he sniffed. There. That was it. That was where the smell of chicken soup was coming from.

Despite himself, he couldn’t help being a little impressed. How on earth had they managed to pull this one off? His ire took over, and he snapped the water off, stepping out of the shower to wrap a towel around his waist. He didn’t know, but he sure as hell was going to find out. He strode over to the bathroom door, pulling it open as he yelled, “Victor, get in here and-”

He was cut off by a giant wave of water cascading down over his entire body, leaving him soaked and spluttering. He blinked rapidly, trying to clear the water from his eyes as peals of laughter sounded from the hallway in front of him. Yuuri swiped angrily at his eyes, finally allowing him to see his daughter and husband, leaning on each other as they laughed hysterically, obscured slightly from his sight by strips of duct tape stretched across the bathroom doorway.

Yuuri simply glared.

Aki got control of herself first, giggling as she said, “April Fool’s! We figured that after the chicken bullion shower, you’d want to rinse yourself off!”

A corner of Yuuri’s mouth tipped up in spite of himself. “This water trick was clever, how did you do it?”

Victor spoke up this time, pointing to a pile of plastic solo cups that had landed at Yuuri’s feet. “We taped cups filled with water to the door, so that when you opened it, they would fall inwards on you. We were only thinking of you, luybov moya. After all, like Akiya said, we assumed you’d want to clean yourself off after your chicken shower.” He gave his husband a dazzling smile. Yuuri steeled his heart to it as best he could. Victor’s charms were hard to resist, but he had developed the ability to power through them over the years.

“And that’s another thing, Victor. Whatever you did to the shower, I need you to undo it. Now.” He gave his husband his best scathing look.

Victor nodded meekly. “Yes, zvezda moya.” He stepped into the bathroom, looking suitably chastened. Yuuri would have believed it, too, if he hadn’t seen the conspiratorial wink that passed between his daughter and husband. Nevertheless, Victor leaned over the shower, screwed off the head, and removed…a chicken bullion cube?

Yuuri couldn’t help admitting to himself that that had been a stroke of genius. Outwardly, however, he continued to glare at Victor until he had replaced the shower head and thrown away the cube, looking up hopefully at Yuuri on his way past him out of the bathroom. Yuuri simply turned his gaze away, looking up at the ceiling instead. Victor pouted and hung his head, shuffling past him slowly.

When he was almost out of the bathroom, Yuuri called softly, “Oh, and Victor?”

The other man turned around quickly, silver hair whipping around his head. “Yes?”

Yuuri looked him dead in the eye. “Please clean up this water mess, too.” And without another glance, he turned around and walked to the shower. 

Behind him, he heard Aki snort in laughter, and Victor’s grumble, “You have to help, too.”

She replied, “No way, Papa. Otousan’s going to take a shower, and I don’t want to see him naked! This is all you.” As Yuuri turned on the shower to let it run, he heard her feet padding down the hallway.

Victor sighed dramatically, and Yuuri heard the sound of plastic cups being plunked together into a stack. He decided that now was as good a time as any to start his revenge. As he stood in front of the shower, he let out a little sigh, making sure to pepper it with just enough of a sexual moan to capture his husband’s attention. After years of being together, Yuuri knew each little sound that the other man was attuned to, and used this extensive knowledge to his advantage now. Sure that he had Victor’s attention, Yuuri jutted his hip out slightly at a suggestive angle, and unwrapped the towel, allowing it to fall slowly down the curve of his ass before pooling softly on the floor at his feet. Turning his head slightly, he buried one of his hands into his hair, pushing it back and giving his husband a suggestive look out of sideways, half-lidded eyes.

Victor’s mouth hung open as he stared at the display Yuuri was putting on for him. Smirking, he flipped his head back around and stepped into the shower, yanking the curtain shut behind him. He heard Victor whine a little in his throat, and he protested, “That’s not fair, Yuuri!”

Yuuri stifled a chuckle. Making his voice seductive, he purred back, “You’ll just have to wait until later, Victor. I’ll get my revenge on you.”

A moment of silence. Then a reverent whisper. “Yebanootsya, I hope so.”

Despite the warm water pelting down on him, a shiver went up Yuuri’s spine. Too bad his revenge didn’t actually include them having sex. His gorgeous husband was hard to resist.

Trying to keep thoughts of Victor out of his head, Yuuri quickly showered, then cautiously pulled the curtain back. 

He was alone. And it seemed like no more traps had been set in the bathroom. There was even a new, fluffy towel awaiting his use. He dried off, pulled on his clothes, and padded out of the bathroom into the living room, his hair still dripping a little. 

Aki and Victor were sitting on the couch together, Victor reading, Aki scrolling through her phone. Victor looked up as Yuuri entered, and smiled tenderly. He came over to his husband and clucked, “You need to make sure you dry your hair better, luybov moya, or you’ll catch a cold.” Reaching for the towel draped around his husband’s shoulders, Victor scrubbed gently at Yuuri’s wet hair, finishing with a kiss to the forehead. Yuuri smiled up at the taller man, momentarily forgetting that he was meant to be angry about being the butt of so many pranks. 

He quickly remembered, however, and forced his face from a look of adoration into a scowl, and walked over to flop himself onto their oversized armchair. As he sat, a deranged squeal sounded loudly from underneath him. He yelped and sprang up, whirling around to look at his seat. There wasn’t anything on it, so he grabbed the cushion and pulled it up.

There. One of Makkachin’s squeaky toys.

He directed a cool glance at Aki, who was giggling helplessly. She looked up at him, protesting, “But Otousan, you should have seen your face. And that noise! That was classic!” Yuuri sighed and replaced the chair cushion, grabbing the TV remote off of the coffee table as he settled in. He pointed the remote towards the screen and pressed the power button.

Nothing happened.

He frowned, and pushed again, harder this time. Still nothing. He pressed the button several times in a row, moving the remote slightly to see if the signal was being blocked by something in the room. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Victor and Aki trying to stifle their smiles. Suspicion finally dawned on him, and he turned the remote around, looking for the source of his problem.

There. They had put tape over the remote’s sensor. 

He sighed, and tossed the remote back on the coffee table, leveraging himself out of the chair. Fine. He would just go check his social media on the desktop computer, then. 

Yuuri shuffled over to the simple desk that stood along one of the walls of the living room, and plopped himself onto the desk chair. As he did, a loud honk blared through the apartment, identical to the one he’d heard that morning. He sprang up with a yelp, whipping his head down to look under the chair. 

Yep. There was another air horn taped to the supporting column, head positioned so that it would depress when someone sat on the chair. He glared over at the direction of the couch, ignoring the muffled laughter as he ripped the air horn off the chair and resettled himself into it with a huff. He turned the monitor on and waited until it powered up, then clicked on the internet browser.

Or at least, he tried to. The cursor on the screen hadn’t moved at all. 

Puzzled, Yuuri scooted the mouse around the desktop, shuffling it wildly back and forth in an effort to wake it up. The cursor still refused to move.

Finally, he picked up the mouse, giving it the same inspection that he had given the remote. He flipped it over, and there, staring up at him, was a picture of Aki and Victor, winking and flashing peace signs over the mouse’s sensor.

He heard a snort of laughter from behind him, but ignored it. He dropped the mouse flatly on the desk, and pushed the chair out from behind him. Obviously, all his attempts at using technology were going to be foiled. Instead, he went over to the bookshelf that was embedded in the wall, looking for the book that he had been reading. However, it wasn’t where he had put it.

Had he left it somewhere? He turned around, and eyed his husband. Victor looked distinctly suspicious, wearing the most falsely innocent look on his face that he could summon. Yuuri sighed inwardly. He should have guessed. He looked at his daughter instead, and asked, “Akilina, have you seen my book?”

She tilted her head up at him, an echo of her papa’s innocent look on her face. “Yeah, ‘Tousan, I think you took it to your room last night.” She turned her gaze back to her phone, but Yuuri wasn’t fooled. He slumped his head forward momentarily in defeat, and went to his and Victor’s room to see what awaited him next.

It wasn’t hard to find. As soon as he entered, his gaze was drawn by a lime-green lump on his nightstand. He walked over slowly, his worst fears confirmed as he saw his book, encased in a lump of lime Jell-O. 

Yuuri seethed. This was too far! How was he supposed to get the book out of the Jell-O? And how was he supposed to read it now? The pages would all be ruined! He grabbed the plate with the Jell-O monstrosity on it, and stomped back into the living room. As soon as he entered, Victor jumped up with a grin on his face. “Relax, dorogoy moy, that wasn’t your actual book. I went out and bought a used copy at a bookstore to put in the Jell-O. Here, see, I have your book right here.” He waved a copy of the book, and Yuuri caught sight of the silver bookmark he’d been using.

His wrath appeased a little, Yuuri placed the Jell-O on a side table, and walked over to take the book from his husband. Victor smiled up at him, and patted the middle couch cushion between himself and Aki. “Come sit, luybov moya.”

Yuuri relaxed a little, and sat down in the proffered seat. As he did, though, a long, withdrawn toot came from underneath him. His expression hardened as he got back up and whipped the couch cushion off.

A whoopee cushion. Perfect.

He turned his gaze first on his daughter, who was curled up into the corner of the couch, shaking with repressed laughter, and then on his husband, who looked up at him with wide, sweet eyes, a smile playing around his supple lips. Yuuri sucked in a breath, and pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes as he did so. “You two. Is it too much to ask that I be able to sit down in peace today?”

A snort of laughter sounded at that, and Yuuri snapped. He twirled around on his heel and stormed out of the room. Victor called behind him, “Lyubimyy, where are you going?”

His sweet talk wouldn’t do him any good now. “I’m going to our room,” Yuuri growled. “Since I am apparently not safe with my family at the moment!” He stomped down the hallway, grumbling to himself in Japanese about people who got what was coming to them.

The rest of the morning was spent quietly enough in the safety of their bedroom, reading his rescued book. A little bit after noon, he was interrupted by a quiet knock on the door. He lowered his book and stared at the door, stone-faced. A short pause. Then a light voice came from the hallway. “Otousan, can I come in? I brought you some lunch. You know, as an apology for breakfast this morning.”

Yuuri felt his face soften, and he sighed. It was hard to stay mad at his bright, sunny daughter. He turned his head to the side and called softly, “Hai, you can come in, Aki.”

The door creaked open, and Aki entered, balancing a tray in her hands. She walked over to the chair Yuuri was sitting in, and stood over him, her face hopeful. “’Tousan, you aren’t still upset, are you? Papa and I were just playing jokes on you. We didn’t mean to make you mad. It’s just that you’re so fun to play tricks on, ‘Tousan.”

Yuuri peered up at her with as much disinterest as he could summon while looking into her sparkling black eyes. “Calling me “‘Tousan” and being all cute isn’t going to help you, you know,” he observed blandly.

Aki smiled wider. “Oh, but ‘Tousan, I know you love it!”

He winced a little. She had him there. He had a soft spot for the nickname she had called him before she could properly pronounce the Japanese word for father. He sighed in defeat, and rewarded her with a smile. “Yeah, you’re right. Ok, let’s have the food, then.”

She placed the tray across the arms of his chair, and smiled down at him. Yuuri peered at the food critically. Soda, yogurt, and…a moldy sandwich? He raised one eyebrow up at his daughter. She grinned. “April Fool’s, ‘Tousan. It’s just food coloring. Did you think the bread was moldy?” She picked up a cup with ice in it, and shook it slightly. “Do you want some ice for your soda? It’s warm right now.”

Well, it could have definitely been worse than a fake-moldy sandwich, Yuuri mused as he nodded. Unfortunately for him, he missed the devilish grin that foretold his downfall as Aki plunked three cubes of ice into his drink. She gave him a kiss on top of his head, and bounced out of the room. She poked her head back through the doorway, though, and chirped, “‘Tousan dai suki!” before withdrawing again.

Yuuri smiled at the empty doorway. Even in the midst of her teen angst years, she was still his sweet little girl. He absentmindedly munched on his “moldy” sandwich for a few minutes in peace.

At least until all hell broke loose.

Yuuri was drawn back to reality by a popping, foaming noise from his glass. He peered into it, and yelped, quickly jumping back as a tower of foam shot out of the top, spraying all over the tray, the floor, the chair, and Yuuri himself.

“AKILINA!” he yelled, scrambling to get the tray off of his lap. He heard her laughter as she came rushing down the hallway. “Oh, did it finally go off, Otousan? It took a while!”

“Akilina Katsuki-Nikiforov, what did you do to my drink?”

She smiled and stated, “There were Mentos in the ice cubes! It was like a time bomb! Pretty funny, right?”

Yuuri drew himself up slowly, looking down at his teenaged daughter. “Akilina. This is quite enough. You have made a mess out of my bedroom. Now, I am going to go take another shower, and while I am in there, you will be in here. Cleaning up this mess. Not setting any traps for me in the bathroom. Not making the shower smell like chicken soup. You will simply be getting the soda out of the carpet, and making that eruption stop.” He gestured towards the glass that was still overflowing lazily. “Do you understand me?”

Aki looked up at him meekly. “Yes, Otousan.” 

Yuuri nodded. “Good.” He glided sedately out of the room past her, calling for his husband to bring him a change of clothes as he went into the bathroom.

After his shower, the rest of his afternoon was spent like his morning, holed up in his bedroom for safety’s sake, finishing up his book. When the sky began to be tinted with blushes of rose, Yuuri shut his book and stretched. He was hungry. Between breakfast that morning and the exploding soda, he hadn’t really had much to eat all day. He opened the door to his room carefully, checking for more traps. All seemed quiet now, though. Hopefully his breakdown earlier had put a stop to more pranks.

He entered the hallway and cautiously made his way to the hall closet, taking his coat out. Pulling it on, he entered the living room on his way to the front door, and froze.

On the wall by the TV were several picture frames where photos of their family and friends normally hung. Now, however, what greeted him instead was a wall of Vladimir Putins. He turned to look at the mantle, and saw the same thing. Another thought caught his mind, and he twisted his head around to look at the landscape that normally hung on the opposite wall. That, too, had been repapered with pictures of Putin.

The corner of Yuuri’s mouth tilted up against his will. He caught himself, though, and shook his head, schooling his features into a scowl. After all, these were supposed to be photos of his precious family, not some old ex-president. He filled his lungs with air, and yelled, “VICTOR!”

From the kitchen, he heard Aki whisper, “Your turn now, Papa. Good luck!”

He scowled at that. “Aki, you, too!” he called.

The two of them stumbled into the living room, lining up in front of him, looking for all the world like petulant children. Underneath the penitent looks, however, Yuuri saw unmistakable glee. 

He glared. “You two, I have had about enough of this April Fool’s Day. I think that you have gone quite far enough with this, and this will be your last prank of the day. I’ll tell you what is going to happen. You are going to replace each and every photo of our precious family that you switched out. And yes, that includes paintings,” he broke in, noticing Aki’s mouth opening. She shut it again, eyes glinting with amusement as her father continued, “And while you are doing that, I am going to go purchase some dinner for all of us. I will be getting take out, and neither of you will be touching it until I have gotten my food out, since apparently I can’t trust you to let me eat today.”

Victor piped up at that. “Yuuri, that’s not fair! I offered to make you a real breakfast this morning!”

Yuuri shot him an icy look. “And just why would I trust that after what you did to my first breakfast?” His husband looked suitably chastened, and Yuuri continued. “I am leaving now. Do you have any questions?”

They both shook their heads. Yuuri nodded in satisfaction. “Good. I’ll be going now.” He dug in his coat pocket for his key, but all that met his questing hand was something papery. He frowned, drew out the object, and stared at it.

It was a cardboard cutout of car keys. 

Victor and Aki snorted as they tried to keep their laughter at bay. Yuuri turned his stare back on them, and held out his hand expectantly without a word. Victor dug into his back pocket, produced the car keys, and handed them over to his husband, spluttering back his laughter the whole time. With one last scathing look, Yuuri swept out of the apartment, not looking back. It wouldn’t do for them to see on his face that he was impressed with their ability to predict his actions so well.

True to their word, by the time Yuuri returned, the apartment was back to normal, all of his family and friends smiling out at him from their proper positions. Dinner was uneventful, filled with small chatter and a recounting of some of the best pranks his family had pulled off. Despite himself, Yuuri relaxed, and even chuckled along with them as they recalled pranks of years past and compared them to their day’s work today. Besides, relaxing and making them think they were forgiven was all a part of Yuuri’s master plan.

After dinner, the family settled in to watch a TV drama, until Aki’s yawns grew close together. Yuuri turned off the TV and nudged her up, pushing her gently down the hallway to her room. As she shuffled away, Victor looked at Yuuri hopefully, and moved closer to him on the couch, leaning in for a kiss.

However, just as their lips touched, an ear-splitting shriek followed by a bang reverberated throughout the apartment. Victor bolted up, calling, “Aki! Aki, what’s wrong?” as he dashed down the hallway, followed much more slowly by his husband.

Victor bowled into Aki’s room, demanding, “Aki, what happened? Are you ok?”

She stood by the side of her bed, hand splayed over her heart, breathing heavily. As Yuuri sauntered into her doorway, her wide eyes fixated on him, and she pointed her other hand at him shakily, screeching, “You! Did you do this?”

Yuuri smirked. “Did I do what, malyshka?” 

Aki glared at him. “Don’t play dumb, Otousan! How did you even manage to do this?”

Her father responded nonchalantly, “Oh, you can find pretty much anything on the internet, don’t you think?”

Victor, growing impatient, grabbed Aki’s shoulder and shook it lightly. “Moya orel’ka, what are you talking about? What happened? Are you ok?”

She shook off her father’s hand, and gave a look of disgust. “Da, Papa, I’m fine. Otousan just managed to scare me, that’s all.” She gestured towards her bed, indicating the cover that had been pulled back to reveal a giant, grotesquely grinning clown’s face emblazoned on her sheets, with matching pillowcases. 

Victor spluttered a little, gazing at his husband in awe. “You mean Otousan finally got revenge on you?” He turned towards Yuuri, unmistakable pride on his face. 

Yuuri smiled back coolly. “Consider this payback for today, Aki.” He crossed the room to give her a reassuring hug, breaking his expression to smile down fondly at her. “Oyasumi, luybov moya.” 

She laughed up at him. “Good night, Otousan.” She gave him a peck on the cheek, then one to Victor. “Good night, Papa.”

Victor smiled and ruffled her hair. “Good night, Akiya.”

The two men exited her room, and the door clicked softly shut behind them. Yuuri sighed and stretched his neck sideways, cracking his knuckles in front of him as he did so. “Well, Vitya, should we go to bed, too?” He looked up at his husband with hooded eyes and a sexy smirk on his lips. 

Victor’s eyes widened. He nodded, and allowed himself to be led to their room by his hand. Yuuri kicked the door shut behind them, pushing Victor down to sprawl across the bed. Keeping his eyes locked on his husband’s, Yuuri slowly stripped off his clothes, putting on a little show, wiggling his hips and flourishing his body into elegant lines. Victor stared, entranced, as Yuuri stalked over to the bed, and slunk on top of Victor, pressing kisses along his neck.

Victor moaned, low and heated, as his husband began to undress him as well, peppering his body with kisses along the way. Finally, they were both bare, and Yuuri looked into Victor’s eyes and whispered, “Can you get yourself ready for me?”

He nodded fervently, scrambling to sit up and reach the lube in the nightstand. When he turned back around, bottle in hand, Yuuri had sprawled himself out on the bed, spreading his legs to give Victor a view of his body. He hurriedly squeezed some lube out onto his open palm, staring at this beautiful man. As he reached for his cock to spread the lube, Yuuri reached a slim finger down and began tracing his entrance with the tip. Victor froze.

Yuuri purred, “Don’t stop, love. Get ready for me.”

Dumbly, Victor nodded, and slowly began stroking himself as he watched Yuuri in fascination. 

For several minutes, the show continued, Yuuri touching himself and moaning sweetly as Victor watched. Finally, when he was sure he could take no more, Victor reached out to embrace his husband.

Or tried to. As he moved his hand off of his cock, it came away slowly, sticky strings stretching between his member and his palm. Puzzled, he looked at it, then up at Yuuri, who was now sitting up, watching with a smirk on his face that could only be described as vengeful.

Slowly, the truth dawned on Victor, and he breathed, “Yuuri, what did you do?”

The smirk widened. “Why, nothing but an April Fool’s Day prank, lapochka. Don’t you like it? I was under the impression that you thought pranks were funny.”

Panicked, Victor pressed, “Yuuri, what did you do?” 

“I switched the lube with superglue.”

Victor stared at him. “What.” It wasn’t a question, just a flat, abject statement of horror.

Yuuri levered himself up onto his knees, drawing his face close to Victor’s. He reached a hand out, trailing his fingers under the Russian’s chin, and said in a sultry voice, “I put superglue in the lube bottle. So I’d suggest that you go wash yourself off before it dries completely. Don’t worry, I made sure it was non-toxic, but if you want to actually have fun with me, you should probably get that off your dick first.” He reached his tongue out and licked the seam of Victor’s lips before pecking them with a soft kiss. “Oh yes, and I believe what one says at a time like this is April Fool’s!”

Dazed, Victor got up to obey, and stumbled into the half bathroom connected to their bedroom. Yuuri watched him go and smiled to himself.

Yes, this had turned out to be a rather good April Fool’s Day after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I officially love writing Aki now. Also, I realize that if she's a teenager, the probability of Makkachin being around IRL is slim to none. But Makkachin is immortal, and nobody can convince me otherwise.
> 
> Translation notes, in order of use in story:
> 
> Lyubov moya: my love  
> Akiya: diminutive of Aki, basically meaning little Aki  
> Zvezda moya: my star  
> Yebanootsya: roughly translates to fuck or my God  
> Dorogoy moy: my dear  
> Lyubimyy: literally translates to favorite, can also be used as sweetheart, etc.  
> Hai (Japanese): yes  
> Dai suki (Japanse): I love you  
> Malyshka: general term of endearment used for little girls  
> Moya orel'ka: my little eagle. Akilina means powerful eagle, so this is a play on her name  
> Da: yes  
> Oyasumi (Japanese): good night  
> Lapochka: sweetie


End file.
